Shark Week: Rocking your Face off for 22 years!

What's the eating disorder where you get fatter instead of skinnier? I think I have it, as this will be my 3rd food post in recent history. However, I'm so damn proud, I'm doing it anyway.

I made a ridiculous cake in honor of Shark Week (one of my favorite holidays) and I had to share it with the internets. Honestly, it tasted like shit because apparently you're supposed to flavor fondant. Whatever, Duff never told me that. All he ever shows is cutting the cake (which I tried to do... it sort of worked) and putting some other frosting on before the fondant. I have to admit I had no idea what fondant was until 5 pm yesterday when I decided I wanted to make this damn cake.

It was actually quite fun, but still took me 4 hours to do. I don't forsee this happening again in my future unless I quit my job and go to culinary school... which, secretly I would love to do and is my #23 thing I want to do in my life: Take a cooking class!

Peanut Butter makes the world go round

I would first and foremost like to say just how sorry I am for you if you are allergic to peanuts. Not only must eating in general suck for you, but I bet that whole "life threatening allergy" really makes you a little sad.

This summer, I spent some time with a young lady who had said allergy. We had to watch everything we ate around her, including not having peanut butter sandwiches in our lunches. It was the saddest week of my life.

Over the past few weeks, I've eaten an entire 40 oz. container of chunky peanut butter. This is averaging just under 10 ounces of PB a week. This is not abnormal consumption, by any means, on my part. However, I wanted to point out how abnormal it probably is for someone to be able to pound down a jar of peanut butter in 4 weeks. VERY abnormal. The average US consumer will eat 3 pounds of PB a year. (www.peanutbutter.com/funfacts). My jar of peanut butter is 2 lbs 8 ounces. In 1 year, I will have consumed 32.5 pounds of peanut butter. Yes, my friends. 11 times average. This makes me about 99% more likely than all other Americans to have a heart attack by the time I'm 27. How do I get to the YMCA again?